Saturdays

Saturdays are my favorite day of the week.

On Saturdays Daddy, (Mark) is home, and Mommy, (aka* me) is now a part of a normal family unit, or so I tell myself, for the next 48 hours.   There is a Mother, a Father, and three children...  perfect! :)

On this lovely day I can look forward to;

• At least one back rub
• As much adult conversation as I can cram into each moment 

(driving poor Mark mental, "honey did you hear me? What do you think of that? Are you listening? Why don't you answer me?  Turn off the T.V.! " )

• All my boys home to cook for and share meals with! :)

I love love to cook! :)  I plan my meals all week so my boys get some fabulous home cooked goodness when we are all together on Saturdays and Sundays. Also, weekends are the only times I get to cook for Mark and Cooper. The rest of the week Mark eats each meal at work every day and night, and Cooper, of course as he lives with his Mom during the week in Mission, doesn't eat here either :(

• Not having to be the only one keeping my two year old son alive, safe and entertained 

Ensuring he is not destroying something;

1. dumping out my hair  products  
2. rubbing dishsoap in his hair like its gel
3. opening the fridge and removing everything from the bottom shelf to any mysterious location he deems fit (*I found a whole brick of warm cheese in the oven drawer once)
4. painting with toothepaste (*he is very creative and can now do circles!)
5. emptying mamas purse and sticking her Visa, Mastercard and Drivers Licence (along with various other less important cards) into his wipes container where we will only find them later accidentally..
6. deciding to clean the toilet himself with the toilet brush only to be found dripping wet up to his shoulders and with wet hair..? What on earth...? GROSS!

• time to shower 

(ALONE oh blessed joy, as much as I love my little buddy, its much easier to shave when hes not screaming and tantruming under my feet because I wont let him have the razor. Not to mention the distraction of having him pointing to my boobs and yelling "Booods!" and insisting I do have a "Peeenish" and pointing to that general area while I try to maneuver around him without falling out of the tub)! 

• the ability to put on my shoes and leave the house BY MYSELF 

*(it feels odd, like I accidentally left an arm or leg behind.  I feel awkward and lost in the first ten feet or so, like I might stumble and fall. It almost feels like I cant find my car in a huge parking lot (I hate that). By the time I leave Delaneys coffee shop, a delicious non-fat half-sweet mocha clutched in my hands like the priceless treasure it is, I am already hitting my stride!  

Off I go to run errands.  Shopping without my little buddy is lonely!  I have to remind myself this is nice, its so easy and...hmnnn, so quiet?  
It doesn't help that everywhere I go in my small community where I live and people know me, over and over they ask, "hey, where is your little guy today? Where is Grayson?"   Its so odd, sometimes I feel guilty when they ask me, like I am doing something wrong!
"Oh, he's at home with Daddy today," I reply with forced cheerfulness,  "its Mommy time today" I say to the cashier at Save On Foods with extra enthusiasm.  Following this will be a brief diatribe on how nice it is to have ME time, yes its really really lovely and peaceful, just so much Easier, yes.. I am sure you'll see him on Monday back to shopping with Mama! (*where he should be is the implication)

As I go through these motions there is a jangly somewhat disturbing hum of thoughts going on.. These thoughts are running on autopilot somehwhere several layers beneath my conciousness... Humming and buzzing, irritating really;
I wonder what they are up to at home? I hope Daddy didn't fall asleep on the couch and let Grayson destroy the house *visions of him laying in a pool of dishsoap making angels*  
I wonder how long the older boys have been glued to the Wii /  Xbox for?  Did they eat any lunch?  

As much as I do worry about my family when I am away from them, within an hour or two, I am feeling like my steps are lighter, those 'wondering' thoughts intrude less frequently and I feel this odd sense of ....Me?

Yes, its me! Not 'Mama, Mom, or Mommy, not Honey or Sweetie'. Me. Krystal. Like a breath of fresh air.  I shop, *maybe a new book ?  I wander in Winners with my mocha and buy the perfect scarf!
I run errands, I am Me, I am alive. Life is good!

When I pull up to the house a few hours later I can't believe how excited I am to see my family.  I missed them!
When I walk up to the door Grayson sees me through the sliding glass doors and I can hear him yelling, "Mama! Mama!" joyfully as he runs towards me and opens the door, he launches himself at me laughing in that choked up emotional way he has, chanting my name 'mama mama mama' ...It is the most beautiful music to my ears, more incredible than any other sound in the world.. I am literally tearing up and its only been a few hours!  I am so lucky, I think...

I open my arms, he launches himself into them.  Pure Joy.  I hug him so tight and feel the happiness swell up inside me, filling all the corners.  He smells so delicious! Edible really.  If I could bottle this smell... mmmm, I would carry it around with me everywhere I go!  Its like Sunshine after rain, baked pies, fresh cut grass, warm pavement, and.... Peanut butter?!
I am refreshed, revived.. and I wish everyday could be Saturday!

Mark is asleep on the couch, the older boys run in from their bedroom and ask, "Whats for lunch?"
Uh oh...what IS for lunch?.. 


Every day should be Saturday!




Postscript* while most Saturdays follow this sort of pattern, I should advise you that this Saturday I am still in my PJ's and its noon, Daddy is sleeping because he didnt get home from work until 5am, so its me and the three kids downstairs alone, AND I have a horrific Flu so, I dont think I am going anywhere! :(
Maybe I can make my Sunday my Saturday?
... oh I hope I hope I hope!